What 'Lean In' Got Wrong About Indian Women
Sheryl Sandberg told women to lean in. It was inspiring. It was also wrong. Lean-in feminism places all the burden of change on women. It ignores that the system itself is broken.
It's especially wrong for Indian women because it ignores the entire context: safety concerns, family expectations, childcare infrastructure that doesn't exist, social consequences for ambition. An Indian woman can lean in as hard as she wants. If her family disapproves of evening work, if she doesn't feel safe traveling after dark, if she's the only one managing the household, leaning in doesn't change any of that.
The Individual-Focused Trap
Lean-in feminism lets systems off the hook. If a company has no parental leave, the lean-in response is: "Women need to negotiate better arrangements." The systemic response is: "We need infrastructure for parents to stay."
If a woman is passed over for promotion because of bias, lean-in says: "She needs to be more visible." Systemic response: "We need to change how we evaluate leadership."
Individual women can't fix system problems by working harder. Systems problems require system change.
The Indian Context That Lean-In Ignores
Safety: If she doesn't feel safe after dark, if she needs family permission to travel, leaning in at work is only part of the equation.
Family Structure: The assumption is daughters and mothers have different obligations. You can be ambitious, but only if you're also a good daughter-in-law, caring for aging parents, managing the household.
Childcare Infrastructure: India largely lacks childcare options. Leaning in harder doesn't create the infrastructure you need.
Economic Reality: Leaning in assumes you can take risks. But if you're the primary earner or saving for family obligations, being ambitious carries real cost.
What Actually Works: Collective Advocacy and System Change
Policy Change: Parental leave, flexible work, clear anti-harassment policies with enforcement. These are foundational.
Sponsorship at Scale: Not mentoring. Actual sponsorship where senior leaders advocate for women's advancement. Companies systematizing sponsorship see higher promotion rates.
Transparent Pay and Promotion: Bias disappears when systems are transparent.
Structural Support for Caregiving: Flexible work, leave options, subsidized childcare, elder-care support.
Psychological Safety: Companies where women feel safe speaking and ideas are credited retain women and benefit from their contributions.
You can't solve system problems by working harder. You solve them by changing the system.
The women who thrive long-term are in organizations that have actually fixed the broken parts. If you're struggling, it might not be that you're not leaning in enough. It might be that the system doesn't support the excellence you're trying to achieve.